Author Archives: cometorachel

About cometorachel

I am a stand-up comedian and writer who has had hemiplegia, a rare-ish form of cerebral palsy which affects one side of the body (in my case the right) since birth. I also have curvature of the spine. I speak German, Spanish and Italian just about fluently, French badly, and am currently learning Portuguese. I have been a vegetarian for many years. I am on Facebook at and Twitter at

Update on the Festival of Brexit

I was reading today’s Daily Mirror in Sainsbury’s cafe, while having a bubble’n’squeak panini with chips and a mug of tea, and I noticed a wee mention of the Festival of Brexit – the subject of my previous blog post. … Continue reading

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ROLL UP! ROLL UP! for the Festival Of Brexit

The current Tory government has announced that it intends to press ahead with plans for a Festival Of Brexit, which was apparently initiated by Theresa May. (The Tories haven’t said whether or not they’ll still hold their silly festival if … Continue reading

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Jags-related poems for National Poetry Day

THE GOAL THAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN Ghost goal Disallowed It crossed the line though   BOUNCY ANGEL Ryan Edwards Bouncing angel Bouncy bouncy bouncy   23RD OCTOBER 1971 Greatest day in sporting history We won Four – one.     … Continue reading

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Boris Johnson is the scum of the earth

The image below was made by me for a competition currently being run by Led By Donkeys (you know, those guys who do brilliant billboard posters exposing the scummiest politicians for what they are).

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Partick Thistle Open Day 2019

I attended this year’s Partick Thistle Open Day, which took place on Saturday. (Thistle lost 2-1 at home to Dundee United the previous evening, with Lawrence Shankland surprisingly only scoring one of United’s goals; I had originally been planning to … Continue reading

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Update on “appropriately-named things” post

Following my recent post about appropriately-named things, something happened this weekend involving possibly the most appropriate name ever. I was at Victoria Station yesterday morning when I learnt about this. Anyhoo, over the weekend – due to not being anywhere … Continue reading

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Going to Partick Thistle Open Day – UPDATED

Before I start, I would like to announce that this is the first blog post I am writing on the new tablet I bought a few weeks ago. I am planning to go to Thistle’s Open Day on Saturday – … Continue reading

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